Do employers care about your mental health?

Do employers care about your mental health?

Your mental health – How much do you honestly think your employer cares about it?

Do you feel that they care more about business results than the mental health of the people they manage?

I was motivated to think about this question and write this post as a result of another blog post I saw. A woman that sent an email to her boss to say she needed to take a mental health sick day got a really cool response. You can read about it here

What do you think your boss would say if you sent an email saying you were having a mental health sick day? Would they respond kindly or would they respond asking for an update on your work! In many cases bosses lack empathy towards employees.

Is mental health in your workplace taken as seriously as physical health?

It might be slightly different of course with an obvious physical illness. You know the sort of thing, leg in cast, swollen eye, streaming cold or sporting injury. Or even an operation where you are actually in hospital and completely unable to work ,so the boss can be satisfied you are no good to them whatsoever for a while.

Most people have sympathy towards physical illness don’t they? ‘Awwww, that looks sore’ or ‘you poor thing, hope you are feeling better soon’. But is there the same level of sympathy towards mental health or is there still a bit of a stigma? Many people are not keen to openly talk about depression although mixed anxiety & depression is the most common mental disorder in Britain, with 7.8% of people meeting criteria for diagnosis and 4-10% of people in England experiencing depression in their lifetime.

Is there still a mental health stigma?

Hard day at the office

Why is there any stigma or lack of support for mental health issues in the workplace? Luckily, high profile people like Price Harry are really helping matters by talking about it. He has openly said how the death of his mother, Princess Diana affected his mental health and wellbeing.

 

You might not think there is a stigma as you may be lucky to be in a workplace that is supportive of mental health issues like Laing O’Rourke. But there clearly is a huge problem 49% of people saying they would be unlikely to tell their boss about problems such as anxiety, depression or bipolar disorder. Only 35% said they’d be happy to tell colleagues.

They say people leave companies because of bad bosses….

Some workplaces are almost archaic in their support of mental health issues. Managers that are so wrapped up in their own careers and living and breathing ‘work’ that they forget the people that work for them are PEOPLE. It makes a real difference when your manager bothers to get to know you as a person. Asks after your family, makes you feel like a human.

And when you have a mental health issue and you manager is supportive, wow! That can really make or break your happiness at work. Maybe they support you be making changes to your hours, or your workload or support appointments for you to get professional help.

Or maybe they simply respect that not every day you are able to put in your most amazing performance or effort.  It doesn’t make you a less committed or able employee. Businesses are obsessed with number of hours worked when actually you can be just as efficient and if not more in less hours if you are happy and supported.

It’s time for employers to wake up and smell the bachs remedy

Mental Health in the UK

It is so shortsighted for employers not to consider the mental health of it’s employees part of its strategy and company ethos.

In business speak, the costs of not doing so are massive with mixed anxiety and depression estimated to cause one fifth of days lost from work in Britain.

 

Things that don’t help mental health at work are:

  • Unsupportive company ethos
  • Bullying
  • Systems and processes that cause stress
  • Regular overworking
  • Lack of ‘Wellbeing at work’ initiatives
  • Lack of support from managers and HR
  • Lack of appropriate training
  • Unrealistic targets and timescales

The things on this list cause stress and anxiety in abundance. Both of which can lead to depression and absence from work.

Some companies are wellbeing aware

Time to change

Luckily 500 smart companies have signed up for the Time to Change Pledge to challenge mental health stigma and discrimination across England.

 

 

In a really great guide from Mentalhealth.org.uk they explain that good mental health practices have to start with managers. They advise looking out for these things in employees:

  • Irritable
  • Sensitive to criticism
  • Loss of confidence or humour
  • Making more mistakes
  • Indecisive
  • Lack of concentration
  • Not taking breaks
  • Becoming introverted or extroverted
  • Displaying stress
  • Looking tired
  • Lack of motivation

 

Prevention will pay dividends

There is also a great deal that can be done at prevention level which starts with having an open approach to mental health. Talking about it in the company and being supportive of people working their contracted hours and not regularly expecting more. Have realistic job descriptions and treat people like people.

Of course people want to do a good job and be successful, it’s good for self-esteem and motivation. But they also want lives and energy to enjoy themselves!

Some companies cottoned onto the benefits of having a workforce who nurture their mental health a while ago. Some of the best are mentioned here

If you know a company that are good at caring about the mental health of their employees, please give them a shout out in the comments of this blog. They deserve it 🙂

There is a very simple sum too which sums up why employers should care about mental health.

Happy staff = staff that want to make customers happy = happy business = attracts high quality employees that want to work there = happy business etc

In short, caring about your brain is a no brainer 🙂

A quick word for the self employed

As you are your own boss, you are responsible for your own mental health. Self employed people can be so enthusiastic about their businesses that they let their self-care slip. Don’t let this be you! If you are in business you will know that you need to play both the short game and the long game and this applies to your physical and mental health too.

Schedule days off and holidays. Make sure your customers and clients know your working hours so your ‘free time’ does not become ‘work time’.

So many people leave Corporate life to enjoy the benefits of being self employed and actually ending working harder and longer. Nothing wrong with passion for your business, but if you burn out you won’t be able to do very much at all.

You have personal responsilbity for your own mental health too

Of course, work is not the only cause of mental health issues. Problems can arise after a life changing event, illness or for no reason at all unfortunately. There is loads you can do to take care of your own wellbeing and keep mental health issues at bay. Then you can enjoy your work and the rest of your life to the best of your ability.

Sign up for the free 21 Day Wellbeing Challenge

I’ve seen enough ‘frazzled’ clients to understand that prevention is always better than cure when it comes to mental health.

You might want to sign up for my free 21 Day Wellbeing Challenge which is an easy to follow plan for busy people. Just sign up via the pop up here on my website.

The impact of judging others on your self-esteem

The impact of judging others on your self-esteem

The impact of judging others on your self-esteem

Wayne Dyer

I will need to exercise some self-control in writing this blog, or we could end up with a very long blog! I learnt a long time ago to be less judgemental because working with people I know that not everything is as it seems.

A large part of my work is helping people become more confident, increase their self-esteem and cover what I call ‘work of the self’. This is helping people to understand themselves better through uncovering their values and finding their identity so they can be ‘comfortable in their own skin’. The benefits of this are that they can be more confident in and live their life in a way that feels good for them.

It’s much easier to make the right decisions when you know yourself and the world can see the real you. Everything changes.

What happens when we judge others?

So back to judging others… When we judge others it does two things.

1 – It holds that person up against our own values and beliefs. It has nothing to do with who they are! I’m going to give you some scenarios and I want you to just see what enters your head as I say these things.

2 – It puts bad thoughts in your mind which will make you feel bad

Think about how you might judge these people

  • A married couple that live apart
  • Someone that loves to socialise to the point where they spend all their money on it
  • Someone that is very prudent and rarely ‘splashes out’
  • Someone that works a lot and is often away from home
  • Some that does not work
  • Someone that wears revealing clothes

The thing is you don’t know anything about these people. They might be pure of heart or not, you don’t know. They might be generous or kind, you don’t know. They might be gentle, rich, poor, stressed, depressed, worried…..

Don’t hate the rice!

Judging others does is puts thoughts in your mind which damage your self-esteem. I don’t know if you have ever seen the Rice Consciousness experiment, inspired by Dr Masaru Emoto but it’s fascinating.

By labelling one jar ‘hate’ and the other ‘love’, the rice in the hate jar rots away while the rice in the love jar stays fresh. And this isn’t the only time this has been done. It has been done numerous times with different substances.

So if you think bad thoughts, you will probably feel bad inside (even though you might not consciously connect this). If you think good thoughts, you will feel better. Simples.

And when you judge others less, you will feel less judged yourself. Because if you haven’t having those thoughts about other people why would they be having them about you?

Find the gold

find the gold

Here are my top tips for not judging others:

  • Listen to what other people say. Don’t judge them on their clothes, hair, car job. Listen and see them for who they are
  • Be open minded about new people. They might not look like your ‘type’ of person but they might be the best thing since sliced bread
  • Don’t go on first impressions. I know they are said to be important but they are just a snapshot of someone at one particular time. Everyone is multi faceted and different situations make people behave differently. If someone is suffering from anxiety or depression, you won’t see the best of them at that time.
  • Don’t let someone else’s opinion of someone get in the way of you forming your own
  • Look for things you like about someone rather than something you don’t
  • Find the gold in someone. What makes their eyes light up? A loved one, a hobbie, holidays? Whatever it is, when you see them talk about it watch them shine and see the best of them

Check your words before they come out of your mouth.Just like you would check an email before sending it. Try and be kind.

Here’s the plan:

  • Be less judgemental and see if it makes a difference to how you feel and your map of the world

 

Do you need help?

If you feel judged yourself, that is an indication of low confidence and self-esteem so please get in touch for a free consultation to see how I can help you.

The highest rising demand for my services is with teenage girls. I’m finding they really worry about being judged in terms of are they cool enough, pretty enough, thin enough. Social media like Facebook, Instagram, Snapchat and Pinterest really feeds these insecurities and affects their self-esteem. I work with them to help them like themselves and become more resilient.

Sending you non-judgemental vibes.

Honey

Why getting motivated is as easy as changing your outfit

Why getting motivated is as easy as changing your outfit

Why getting motivated is as easy as changing your outfit

You know how it is. You’ve had sleep but you are still tired. You’ve got a to do list as long as your arm and people expecting things from you just don’t feel like doing anything. You need to get motivated! If only you could get some motivation juice and take a gulp! You know you are wasting your talents and you feel frustrated that you don’t seem to be able to get a handle of the situation.

So how can you get motivated?

We are in a state every second of every day. Some states are positive and some negative. It’s easy for us to slip into different states as we are so versatile but the more time we spend in a particular state, the more comfortable it will be for us to be there. and the easier we make it for our brains to access that state. Think about your ‘default’ state. What is it?

If you are prone to feeling depressed, that’s because you might have made it your ‘default’ state. You know how to feel that way and are not making changes to be in a different state. Sometimes making changes can feel uncomfortable or scary. And it might take effort. But the good news is the more you use techniques to changes your state, the easieryou will be able to do it.

Changing your state is as easy as changing your outfit!

Here are 5 ways to get more motivated:

1 – Do not hide. Get dressed, open the curtains, tidy up and make your surroundings ‘open’

2 – Talk to someone. Anyone. Even if you ask a neighbour a question or call a company to query a bill, you are having an interaction which will stimulate your brain.

3 – Watch or listen to something motivational. I wrote about people that inspire me in a previous blog but you will have your own list I’m sure. You only need one to get you going!

4 – Go outside. Even a 5 minute walk will change your state. Notice things you haven’t seen before.

5 – Listen to this 5 minute audio which will help you feel motivated

Change your state

When I work with clients in my Hypnotherapy practice in West Sussex and Skype, I get them to focus on the time they spend not doing the thing they don’t want to be doing or feeling the way they don’t to be feeling.

For example:

A client that come for help with anxiety or panic attacks won’t be in that state all the time. It would be exhausting. So we examine the times when they don’t feel anxious and work with that.

A client that comes for weight loss can’t be eating all the time. So we look at the times when they are not eating.

A client that comes for stop smoking will not always be smoking. So we look at the times they are not smoking.

A client who feels depressed, will have times when they do not feel depressed or as depressed so we extend those times to make it easier for the brain to know how not to be depressed.

A client who comes for help with stress may feel stressed a lot of the time, so we need to introduce a feeling of not being stressed and extend the time spent in that state.

Once you learn that you can choose you state it’s just like choosing what outfit to wear 🙂

 

This blog is one in a 30 day series about self-development and practical lists we will be making to enhance our lives. I’m using these blogs to provide coaching and advice in my capacity as a qualified coach and Hypnotherapist working locally in West Sussex and Worldwide on Skype.

 

Quick review of yesterday’s list:

Yesterday you wrote a list of negative thoughts you might feel. Were you surprised at how many of how few there were?

 

Your get motivated list

Today list is to write a list of ways and times you would like to feel more motivated and then choose your state to get more motivated.

See you tomorrow.

Honey (Sussex based Hypnotherapist that helps people with stop smoking, anxiety, weight loss, stress and depression).

x

 

Why every thought is a choice

Why every thought is a choice

Why every thought is a choice

It’s 2017 and our lives are full of choice. Have you ever thought about how many choices you make in a day? Let’s take a look!

  • Whether to get up or have another five minutes in bed
  • What to wear
  • What to have for breakfast
  • Which route to take to school run/work
  • Which piece of work to tackle first
  • Which emails to reply to first

And so it goes on…

Then you’ve got choices of what to eat, what to buy, what to watch, what to read, who to be friends with, who to talk to, what to read, where to work, work holiday to take… the choices are endless. And let’s not talk about how you want your coffee 🙂

Choose how you feel by changing how you think

But do you ever take time to choose how you think which in turn creates how you feel? This isn’t about turning your emotions off. We need emotions as humans. It’s about understanding that a thought creates a feeling. So if you get caught up in feeling bad, low or depressed and you know that your thoughts are creating these feelings, this gives you the choice.

The choice whether to continue thinking them and feel bad or the choice to have different thoughts and feel different. 

 

Change your story

change your story

Aren’t thoughts amazing anyway? A thought is an invisible thing that can be an idea, an anxiety, hold anger or make you feel completely rubbish. A thought can be  from the past, present or in the future! Thoughts change worlds and create inventions. Thoughts are humans most powerful asset!

When you have a thought that makes you feel bad it will be because it is attaching itself to a story. A story that you hold in your unconcious mind and connects itself to the thing you feel bad about. When you have the thought, you recall the story unknowingly and your unconcious will also search for other evidence to back it up. Even the silliest little thing that your brain has somehow connected to that story.

For example:

If you are feeling like things don’t go right for you and feeling down about it, you will recall all the times where you think things don’t go right for you and look other times things didn’t go right (or how your brain thinks they didn’t go right if it has aligned that belief to a situation).

It will also look for all the times people said that you didn’t do something right, because your very clever brain is looking for evidence and your unconcious mind has a record of everything that has ever happened in your life. No matter how bad you think your memory is, your unconcious knows! This is how people are able to recall things in Hypnosis when their unconcious mind is fully present.

The choice is yours

So the choice you can make is when you feel yourself slipping into negative thoughts to catch yourself. Stop yourself from falling back into that story which isn’t true and choose a different thought instead.

You can change how you feel about being trapped by emotional pain and not liking yourself if you change your story. Now this might sound impossible and if you need help breaking free from the stories that keep you trapped, then I can help you.

Now here we have looked at how our minds can be naughty and focus on negative stories, but we didn’t cover how our amazing minds can be so powerful when they are being positive! So how about creating some new stories where you are happy and vibrant and looking forward to your day/week/year/life!

 

This blog is one in a 30 day series about self-development and practical lists we will be making to enhance our lives. I’m using these blogs to provide coaching and advice in my capacity as a qualified coach and Hypnotherapist working locally in West Sussex and Worldwide on Skype.

 

Quick review of yesterday’s list:

Yesterday you wrote a list of some smoothies you might want to try. Have you got the ingredients yet?

Your thought choices list

Today list is to try and catch negative thoughts as they arise and write them down. You might be surprised how different they feel when you write them down.

 

See you tomorrow.

Honey ( Sussex based Hypnotherapist that helps people with stop smoking, anxiety, weight loss, stress and depression).

x

 

5 great smoothie recipes you’ll want to try

5 great smoothie recipes you’ll want to try

5 great smoothie recipes you’ll want to try

Earlier this week I blogged about easy ways to eat more healthily. One of the suggestions was by having smoothies. Before we look at 5 nutritious smoothie recipes, let’s cover some smoothie basics.

The reason healthy eating interests me is I am  a Hypnotherapist so I work with people’s minds but in many cases, treatment is about the whole person; mind, body and spirit. I like to keep fit and healthy on a personal level so you could say I have a healthy interest!

How are smoothies different from juices?

Juices extract the liquid and nutrients from the produce that you are juicing and leave behind the pulp. This means you end up with a thin juice, full of nutrients. You should include more vegetables than fruit in your juice or it will be laden with fruit sugars and this will affect your blood sugar. There are different levels of juicer depending how serious you are. The leading person in the juice industry is Jason Vale and he offers free juicing programes several times a year.

Smoothies blend the produce to a thicker consistency and there is no left-over pulp. Smoothies you buy in the shops are often full of sugar from the high fruit content and less nutritious than the ones that you can make for yourself.

What can you put in your smoothie?

Smoothies are a good way to bring healthy foods into your diet easily as no cooking is required! You just whack it all in a suitable blender (some people swear by the Nutribullet. And the Vitamix is the Rolls Royce of the blender world) and it’s ready to drink/eat.

Smoothies can keep you full for hours if you include protein. Your body will love the fibre, vitamins and dense nutrients. You could get your 5 a day in one hit (although it’s now thought we should be aiming for 7-10 portions of fruits and vegetables a day).

Once you start ‘smoothi-ing’! You might want to start create your own recipes. Here are some ingredient ideas. Make vegetables the main ingredient, add some fruit for sweetness, a supplement or two of your choice and a protein to keep you fuller for longer:

Vegetables and fruit

green smoothie

Vegetables

  • Cucumber and celery both provide a lot of juice and are full of nutrients
  • Coconut water which is full of electrolytes or coconut, oat, rice of almond milk.
  • Leaves such as lettuce, rocket, kale and watercress (did you know watercress contains lots of vitamin c)
  • For the brave – cabbage, broccoli, cauliflower, sprouts which all all very good for removing toxins and providing vitamins and minerals.

 

Fruit

  • Pineapple (reduced inflammation)
  • Blueberries – (said to improve memory)
  • Apples & Pears  (which are also good for good digestion)
  • Lemons and Limes (which help alkalise the body)

 

Supplements

You can add lots of healthy supplements to smoothies too such as:

  • Bee pollen is full of enzymes, vitamins and minerals.
  • Aloe Vera has antiviral and antibacterial properties.
  • Supergreens are nutrient packed dark green vegetables.
  • Chia seeds are loaded with nutrients and are among the healthiest foods on the planet.
  • Flax seeds are full of omega essential oils and are also good for the digestion.
  • Goji berries contain a wide range of antioxidants, amino acids, vitamins and minerals.
  • Raw Cacao is a top source of antioxidants and contains an abundance of magnesium and iron.
  • Acai is high in antioxidants and Omega-3 oils.
  • Maca powdera is a mineral-rich food supplement powder.
  • Probiotics such as kefir to keep your gut healthy.

A great place to get healthy supplies from is Healthy Supplies. They are based in West Sussex.

Protein

You can also add some sort of protein as if you include a protein you will stay fuller longer and protein is particularly beneficial after a workout. Some good proteins for smoothies are:

  • Avacado
  • Hemp protein
  • Pea protein
  • Whey protein
  • Peanut butter
  • Natural live yoghurt

 

Here are 5 great smoothie recipes you’ll want to try

  

 

This blog is one in a 30 day series about self-development and practical lists we will be making to enhance our lives. I’m using these blogs to provide coaching and advice in my capacity as a qualified coach and Hypnotherapist working locally in West Sussex and Worldwide on Skype.

 

Quick review of yesterday’s list:

Yesterday you wrote a list of  chunks of your life and what they might be called. Did anything on that list surprise you?

 

Today’s list:

Today’s list is one of your easiest ways to health. Just make a list of the smoothies you are going to have this week and the ingredients you need to buy to make them. If you make a delicious smoothie of your own or already have a recipe to share, please put it in the comments. We would love to try it!

See you tomorrow.

Honey

x

 

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